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Making changes Stick

Part 1 - Understanding

If you want to change your personal reality, you have to change your personality – Dr. Joe Dispenza
Here is a truth for all of us. We all have something we want different in our lives. We want it to be a simple and easy process and yet we know that having to change ourselves is challenging. If we want it to be simple and to happen effortlessly, we need to have an understanding of what needs to change and how we can do it. We can create a new personal reality (our experiences in the world) from within if we know what we are doing.
What is change? Most answers I hear relates to an observable behavioural change in our lives, which is the result of an internal shift. This is where it gets interesting. What is shifting? Change is breaking the chemical addiction the body has as a result of conditioned ways of thinking. Let me explain what this means for us.
We have on average 60000 thoughts a day with 90-95% of these thoughts being the same thoughts we had the day before. This means we are a product of our own habitual thoughts feelings and behaviours. Research has show that by the age of 35 years we have evolved to being a set of memorised behaviours, emotional reactions and unconscious attitudes, beliefs and perceptions that operate on a sub-conscious level.
We are therefore driven by a set of habits, which are a redundant set of thoughts feelings, and behaviours that have been acquired through repetition. The result of our conditioning is that our neuro-circuitry, neuro-chemistry, genetic expression and our biology stays equal to our thoughts, feelings and behaviours. We have hardwired our brains to define our identity and that is what we call our Personality.
When we have a thought our brain creates chemicals associated with that thought. We call this an emotion. This is how our bodies learn to behave accordingly to our patterns of thought. If we reflect on someone we struggle in relationship with and notice our thoughts we have about that individual, we can quickly find an emotion to link to that person. As we bring an experience with that person into our minds the emotional feeling in our bodies is almost visceral. We can feel the thoughts.
Our bodies become addicted and crave the emotional chemicals. When we change, we step into an uncomfortable place where the chemical balance is different and our bodies seek the familiar. This is the space where change is happening and is also the space where our bodies send signals to our brain asking for the chemicals (the way it was). This shows up in the form of the negative voices in our heads (our inner critics) that say things like: ‘Let’s start tomorrow’ or ‘It was good the way it was.’
This is what we are up against and this is why change can be so difficult. Where is the light at the end of the tunnel?
Part 2 will reveal how we can make the changes we desire armed with the knowledge we have about who we are, how we got here and what it means to us

If this article peaks your interest I am keen to have a conversation with you as to how I can work with you and your teams around generating results more effectively. Send me an email – details below.

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ABOUT STEPHEN LIGHT

Stephen Light is a Leadership Expert & Executive Coach who uses Neuroscience as a platform for being more effective at understanding and changing self. He assist leaders in finding more effective ways of leading people through changes resulting in the objectives of teams being met.

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